Imagine a young woman named Jessica. She has just started her second semester of college studying theater. Jessica has always dreamed of being an actor. She loves the stage and the screen and is dying to learn all about it, and to make it her whole life. In high school that seemed like a great idea, as she was the lead role in every school performance, but now she is starting to wonder if she got it wrong. Far from home, surrounded by all new people who are studying for “real jobs” in tech and law, her dream seems silly. Even in her theater classes, other students wonder if they will ever get their big break. Paying her own bills for the first time is making Jessica feel insecure about her choices. She is homesick, and recently her boyfriend from high school whom she swore to love forever sent her a text message, saying he fell for someone else in his college, and that long distance doesn’t work anyway. 

In one of her theater classes, Jessica meets a young woman named Marlene, who changes her whole perspective. They do a theater exercise together, and Marlene is completely immersed in her character. Jessica is so impressed, and compliments Marlene’s performance. “I’m having trouble focusing lately,” Jessica confides in Marlene, “because I’m so worried about whether acting will ever pay my bills. I love it, but I wonder if I should be more practical.”

“Come to my theater club!” Marlene says. Jessica goes. There she meets a group of a few dozen warm and friendly, and exceedingly beautiful actors. “I can tell Jessica is family!” Marlene tells the others, and Jessica is pleased. She wants these radiant people to like her. She reads lines with them and is swept away by their performances. She feels totally at home and accepted. She returns several more times to the club, and finally is introduced to their acting teacher, Laurence. He is a small, unassuming man who gives acting classes several times a week to the group. He looks deep in her eyes, and says that she is going to be a great performer one day, and that her name will be up in lights. “That’s not the point, though,” he cautions, “we act because we love to act, because we feel within us the spirit moving us to perform, to inhabit the lives of others, to feel the oneness and connectedness of all living things and to express that through our art. Not for fame.” Laurence’s words fill Jessica with a sense of finally understanding herself and the world. Yes, she was drawn to acting to feel the oneness, to connect to something greater than herself. Someone finally understood her, and her desire to make the world a better place through performance. The others nod, holding their hands to their hearts. She attends more classes, gets deeper into the acting philosophy. Laurence praises her acting and her beauty regularly while she is on stage, and the others chime in with similar praise. It feels wonderful and reassuring. 

“Our bodies are temples to art, and our temples must be pure to allow ourselves to be clear conduits for the spirit of oneness to move through us,” Laurence says, “In other words, if we fill ourselves with toxins and pollution, we won’t be able to connect to each other.” Jessica has been a vegetarian for years, for environmental reasons, and this resonates with her. Laurence himself is a vegan and Jessica decides to become a vegan, too. It’s easy, because Marlene and all her new friends, her new best friends with whom she is spending more and more time with, are all vegan. It’s part of why they are so thin. They also count their calories carefully, but Jessica is used to this with her actor friends. Laurence also encourages them to be “vegans” with their media consumption, to keep their imaginations and creativity pure. Jessica agrees to try to stop reading the news and even to stop using text and email, as Laurence suggests, to stop “negative energies” from entering her mind. 

Jessica begins to focus more and more on her theater group, the Spirit Family. Everyone talks about Laurence, the Teacher, and how he has completely changed their lives. “He is the smartest, most spiritually in tune person in the world,” they insist. She attends group meetings three times a week, then five. She begins to forget to go to her other classes, and to sleep over in the building where they meet. Laurence suggests she meditate to purify her mind. She gets up in the middle of the night for hours of meditation sessions with the group. Sometimes this makes her feel exhausted, but it also makes her feel purposeful. Laurence suggests she take on a new name, the name of a classic actor, just like everyone else in the group, just like he is Laurence Olivier and Marlene is Marlene Dietrich, as “a manifestation of inspiration to carry with you,” to welcome the spirit of the actor into their minds and guide them. He calls her Audrey, for Audrey Hepburn. Jessica loves this, and insists that everyone call her Audrey. She has more fun and feels more connected to the Family than she ever has with anyone. She finally feels like someone gets how important acting is to her. Audrey is happy to be a part of the family, the most enlightened, talented, and evolved group of people that exists maybe anywhere, and not to be one of the “unevolved,” the sheeple out there who never connect to their spirits. 

Like with many theater kids, her new group of friends are a bit loose with their sexual boundaries, but it’s a while before she notices everyone is having lots of sex, but no one appears to be dating. “We are evolved beyond special relationships,” one friend, Grace, tells her. “Evolving is really important for your craft.” She explains that allowing our bodies to connect in pleasure is a way to keep creativity flowing, but restricting our love to one person will stop the flow of creativity. “We don’t want to be possessed or possessive! Art is about free flowing spirit and passion.” Audrey thinks there must be some truth to this. She decides to try it, because she doesn’t want to be prudish and unevolved, and one night she has sex with one of the men in the group, and feels she must be very evolved. She is not sure if she likes it, but she feels it must be correct, and is therefore good. Soon she is regularly saying yes and having sex with anyone who asks her. “I am evolved,” she tells herself. It seems free-wheeling and lighthearted, and she doesn’t ask herself many questions. No one refuses an offer of sex in the Spirit Family, and Audrey is no exception. Laurence himself seeks her out and they have sex. She feels grateful that he finds her worthy. She does not remember most of the sexual encounters. She finds herself floating away during them, mentally absent. She thinks this must be a sign of the spirit in her. 

Audrey works at a coffee shop as a barista, along with all the Family members, jobs Laurence has suggested. They pool their tips and give them to Laurence, their Teacher, to teach them classes. The classes increase in price the more they attend, because of the increased spiritual value. Audrey had been planning a vacation to the Bahamas in the winter and a trip to visit her parents for Christmas, but she does not have enough money for these plans any longer. None of her fellow Family members go on vacation, unless Teacher determines that their talents are secure enough to survive a long time away from their spiritual source. Audrey questions this to Marlene, thinking maybe it would have been nice to see her family. Marlene tells Laurence, only in order to help Audrey. 

During the acting classes with Laurence, he has suddenly stopped praising Audrey and has begun to criticize her performances viciously. He accuses her of eating meat or having negative thoughts and blocking her pathways to the spirit. He warns her that she must change her ways. Everyone is watching. She feels humiliated, and finally after several sessions of public questioning, she admits to some negative thoughts. Laurence suggests she “refine her mind to allow the spirit to flow, or you will never get your talent back, and your spirit will be clogged forever, and you will continue to be disgusting.” After the class Marlene explains to Audrey that she, too, is refining her mind. “I am finding so much clarity in the process,” she says. She tells Audrey the key is to cleanse herself through control. Marlene suggests cutting her calorie intake by half every day until she is nearly fasting, and then slowly reversing the process, until she is at half the calories she started with, and staying there until Laurence sees improvement. Audrey decides to try this. She knows about juice cleanses and intermittent fasting. This seems like something similar. She “refines her mind,” and all she can think about is food. She is hungry and tired. But she persists. She can’t stop thinking of what it would mean to lose her talent, and be disgusting and filthy and stopped up from her connection to the spirit.

What will her new friends think? Audrey remembers she used to have other friends who weren’t in the Family who might think this whole idea was stupid, but it’s been months since she’s spoken to them, well over a year now, and she doesn’t know what to say. They wouldn’t understand. Audrey loses weight and more weight. Laurence praises her in class again, and she feels relief. The others squeeze her hands when she gets down from the stage and whisper congratulations on her successful refinement. Audrey moves into the dorm with the other Family members so as to maintain her proper refinement. It no longer makes sense for her to live elsewhere, as she is spending all of her time with them. 

One day while studying a Shakespeare text, Audrey catches the eye of Spencer, a young man in the Family. Their eyes meet, and she feels drawn to him. They soon spend more and more time together, and she knows this is exactly the sort of special relationship that Laurence would say is too possessive and unevolved. She couldn’t be in the family if she had a special relationship. If anyone in the family sees, they will tell Laurence. They will only be trying to help her and Spencer, of course, but she has heard that anyone in a special relationship may be asked to leave the group. But Spencer is special, so special, and she can’t stop thinking about him. She doesn’t float away when they have sex, and now she doesn’t want to have sex with anyone else, but when asked she does not know how to say no. 

Spencer suggests they stop having sex with anyone else. “That’s possession!” She whispers accusingly. “I don’t care,” he says, “if that’s what it is, that’s what it is. Let’s possess each other.” “We will become unevolved…” She says nervously. Spencer tells her he thinks it’s time to reconsider being a part of the family. “It’s crazy that we just want to be in a relationship and we feel like we can’t,” he says. She is angry that he would think she would abandon her only chance to meet her potential, be evolved, and let the spirit of art move through her, and help advance society through spiritual purity and oneness. She tells him no, she won’t leave, and she won’t be in a special relationship, no matter how much she might want to. It’s hard to think about this. Audrey is so hungry and tired, and she doesn’t know what else to do. 

Spencer is gone the next day. Later on, Audrey hears he has written a blog of some kind, calling Laurence an abuser and controlling. She is horrified that he would do this, especially that he would criticize their Teacher. Laurence tells the group that they must not speak to Spencer anymore, or any of the others who have denounced the spirit. “They will only drag you down,” he says, “and confuse your channels“. They are the anti-evolved, and they are the worst kind of people. They had the chance to be something evolved and they threw it away. They are even below the sheeple. They will never feel the spirit again, and will surely rot away inside their bodies as their souls have already died. Anyone here seen speaking to the anti-evolved will not be allowed to perform or practice with us anymore. “We don’t want rot to get in, of course.” Audrey resolves not to speak to Spencer again. She does not come to the phone when he calls, and she decides to forget about him. 

So, what is a cult? 

Jessica/Audrey joined a cult. She didn’t mean to, and she doesn’t know yet that it is a cult, but it is. 

What makes the Spirit Family a cult? Not their love of acting, since there are plenty of acting groups that aren’t cults. Not their veganism, nor their non-monogamy, nor even their new names or odd beliefs. We could debate the positive or negative value of any of those things, but they are not what makes this group a cult. What makes it a cult is the deception, coercion and manipulation of the members. 

There are several reputable and well-researched lists of cult characteristics. For this essay, we will use Steve Hassan’s BITE Model of Control as our framework. 

https://freedomofmind.com/cult-mind-control/bite-model/

BITE: Behavior, Information, Thought, and Emotional control. 

Behavior: Jessica/Audrey’s behavior gradually became more and more controlled by the group. Her diet, sleep schedule, finances, vacation decisions and sexual boundaries were dictated to her by the group and its leader. She was isolated from others, and spent large amounts of time only with members absorbing indoctrination of their beliefs. Major decisions required leadership approval, and could not be made by Audrey alone. When she questioned anything, she was subjected to public humiliation and calorie restriction as punishment, all with the ongoing push to believe all this was for her own good, and the good of the world. When she submitted, she was praised. These are methods of behavioral control. 

Information: The Spirit Family controlled the flow of information into the group by discouraging Jessica/Audrey from using email and text, speaking to former members, and seeing her family. She was kept so busy it was hard for her to investigate or consider the claims of the group. Jessica did not know when she went to an acting class that this nice group of folks were going to ultimately lead her down this path. They introduced her to their beliefs and practices in stages, and once she accepted something, they upped the ante and introduced her to something more extreme/controlling, than she would have agreed to had she known what their group was all about from the start. Contrast this to the concept of informed consent. When we agree to be a part of something, we should be able to read to the bottom of the page before signing the contract. The information of what she was agreeing to was withheld from her until she was too far in to say no. Additionally, she was indoctrinated with an “insider vs. outsider” doctrine — the evolved and the sheeple. Jessica/Audrey was spied on by another member, Marlene, and coerced through the usage of humiliation to confess “negative thoughts,” which was then used against her. All of this is classic information control. 

Thought: The Spirit Family created a map of reality, with their ideas about purity and theater, and tied Jessica/Audrey’s sense of safety to her accepting that map of reality, including black-and-white, in-group or out-group thinking. Her name was changed, and she was discouraged from thinking a certain kind of thought known as “negative thoughts.” They used thought-terminating cliches, or pat phrases such as “sheeple” and “let the spirit move through you” and “stopped up from the spirit,” to recreate her reality and reinforce their group control. Those phrases became almost a second language that no one outside the group could understand, which further isolated her. Each phrase is full of complex meanings reduced to a simple phrase, designed to stop a person from thinking. For example, “you don’t want to become unevolved.” These buzzwords limited Jessica/Audrey’s capacity for critical thinking. Clearly, the group taught Jessica/Audrey not to question their leader, and that everyone else’s ideas are less spiritually enlightened and therefore wrong compared to his. They also controlled her thoughts with regular meditation and constant theater practice, which served to prevent her from critical thinking by thought-stopping. These are all methods of thought control. 

Emotional: Jessica/Audrey was targeted for being in a vulnerable time in her life, and was initially emotionally manipulated into the group through flattery and intense group showering of affection, a process known as “lovebombing.” Laurence then used coerced confession, harsh criticism and humiliation (known as the “hot seat”) to create extreme emotional highs and lows, which leads to a profound sense of confusion and dependency, as Jessica was always trying to earn back the acceptance she had lost, and always walked on eggshells, never knowing if she might lose it again. This is emotional manipulation. The group taught that negative emotions are wrong to feel. They instilled guilt and shame in Jessica/Audrey through teaching self blame for not being “pure” or “refined” enough. The group was never to blame, and Laurence was never to blame, rather she was always to blame for anything that went wrong. They instilled fear in her of the world outside of the group, a process known as “phobia indoctrination,” as well as fear of shunning from the group should she do anything they deemed wrong. She was taught to believe the worst people are former members, and that there are terrible consequences if you leave. This is emotional control. 

All of these components together will form dependency and obedience to the leadership of the group through methods of coercive control. This is what happened to Jessica/Audrey.

The cult in this example is quite different from Orthodox Judaism in beliefs and practices, but do the two share any elements? Is there deception in recruitment, manipulation of emotion, restriction of thought, dependency, control, and coercion? We believe there is. You can decide for yourself.